As a society, we are goal orientated. Whether it is the goal of achieving a certain amount of kg off our weight, a new job or promotion, achieving certain grades in school or in this day and age, reaching a certain amount of Instagram followers. Why would it be then, that when we achieve what seems like compelling and lofty goals, we can sometimes feel empty? Like something is missing? Maybe even a little depressed?
This feeling of almost dissatisfaction that we experience, is referred to as "The Arrival Fallacy". The Arrive Fallacy is a term introduced by psychologist Tal Ben-Shahar and is in essence the idea that during the process of working towards a goal, we subconsciously come to realise that we will in fact reach it!
As we then progress closer to achieving this goal our brain releases a soothing effect into the body and the feeling of achievement and success becomes part of our day to day life. This then can lead to the actual event being far less rewarding.
When we get too caught up in future outcomes, we may become attached to an unattainable illusion of perfection. We seek to achieve goal after goal, hoping something will make us happy, which reinforces a cycle of self-doubt and not feeling "good enough".
While it is essential in life to constantly set goals, it is important to see our success and achievements as fluid. It is during the journey not at the destination where we learn the most about ourselves, it provides us with "little wins", and it brings people into our lives than provide us with a wealth of knowledge and self satisfaction.
It is though important to say that setting goals or aiming for success in a certain area of your career isn't a recipe for unhappiness or failure. It is however how you allow that goal to dictate your daily mood that can bring you down.
Here are some tips to ensure that our never ending journey of Self Improvement is a healthy one that accelerates YOUR Success.
- Rediscover your WHY
It can become easy to fixate on the one objective; a Fat Loss Goal, a major fitness event, that promotion or salary. During this time, you may lose sight on WHY you actually started this journey in the first place… Think about what is driving you? What are your internal motivators?
- Enjoy the PROCESS
Successful people and teams enjoy the process of learning. They focus on the happiness accumulated along the way to a particular goal, not necessarily the material outcome.
- Implement a SYSTEM
Setting a big goal like losing 20kgs or running a marathon is awesome! It can give you motivation to change your current habits, but it's not enough. You must commit to a process and take action on a consistent basis. "Consistent Action Creates Consistent Results".
- Success is FLUID
Understand that any metrics of success, whether related to health and fitness, career or whatever else is fluid and constantly moving. What might seem like an unachievable goal 12 months ago, might well seem like a piece of cake 6 months down the track.
*Disclaimer: Individual results vary based on agreed goals. Click here for details.
